Sad Students Find Solace in School Sloths

Sad Students Find Solace in School Sloths

Abigail Harper

Many students at Timpview are feeling misunderstood, forgotten, and alone. To solve this problem administration is bringing pets to the school.

This idea was inspired by the senior class who are studying the true story of Life of Pi. In the book Piscine shares his expert knowledge of sloths. Students recognized the similarities between them and the animals at once.

“The three-toed sloth is not well informed about the outside world. On a scale of 2 to 10, where 2 represents unusual dullness and 10 extreme acuity, sloths are a 3” (Life of Pi, pg. 4)

When seniors approached Dr. Montero with this idea, he was all on board and offered the atrium to house the sloths.

“I don’t know how students have survived so long without therapy sloths.” Montero said. “I know better than anyone how stressful the Timpview environment is, I created it.”

Piscine has an answer for Montero. “How do students survive, you might ask. Precisely by being so slow, sleepiness and slothfulness keep them out of harm’s way, away from the notice of teachers, parents, and friends asking for favours.” (Life of Pi, pg 4)

Montero’s only concern was the fingering of the sloths. “Students will relate to the three-toed sloths better, but the two-toed sloths wouldn’t be able to flip students off, keeping Timpview a safe environment.” No wonder Timpview students relate to sloths so much.

A senior at Timpview high school, who wished to remain anonymous, shared a story of how relatable sloths were to her. “I read that sloths will often grab their own arms thinking its a branch and then fall to their death.” She explained. “The other day, thinking my black painted toe nail was a bug out of the corner of my eye, I stepped on it and tripped myself.”

The sloths are being shipped from the amazon, on amazon, and will arrive on Monday. So if you’re ever feeling alone, go to the sloths, they understand.