In our community, it has become very common for teenagers to go on international humanitarian trips. I could name a dozen people at Timpview who I know have or are going on trips to volunteer in other countries. It is especially popular because of the dominant religion in the area. Teenagers feel like when they go on humanitarian trips, they are living up to the expectations of our religious community. I personally feel like when I watch people I know go on these trips they consider it a “pre-mission.” A way to prepare yourself before the mission trip that so many people in our community take.

People come back from these trips and talk about the amazing life-changing experience they had. They felt like they were able to really connect with themselves and their religion while they volunteered in Ghana, or Mongolia, or Peru. 

All of these teenagers had such amazing experiences. The stories they tell when they come back are so inspiring. Encouraging everyone to go on a humanitarian trip. 

Over the past year I have gone on multiple humanitarian trips. I have been to Tanzania and Cambodia. Next month I am going on another trip to Peru. While on these trips I felt like I had a life-changing experience. It was an extremely emotional experience for me. As I visited orphanages and women’s centers. Seeing the struggles that so many people experience, as we drove through impoverished communities.

While on these trips I felt like I was making a genuine difference. I was helping on service projects, spending time with kids at the orphanage, and spending money in local shops. I felt so grateful for the opportunity I had to help.

However, lately I can’t help but wonder if humanitarian trips are somewhat problematic. 

When I was in a restaurant in Cambodia I came across a poster that was hung up. It was titled 7 Tips for Travelers to Protect Children. It talked about how often the actions of tourists can exploit and harm children.

Tourists treat children as if they are tourist attractions. 

Tourists go into orphanages without proper training.

As I read this poster, I started to feel so guilty. 

When I got home from my trip I started to research about why humanitarian trips might be harmful for the people that are being “helped”. 

These problems include the fact that volunteers work on projects that they do not have the professional skills to do. They build houses that are unsafe. Or they go into schools to teach but don’t have the skills to communicate and help kids learn. Or volunteers visit orphanages and interact with kids who are very vulnerable. Interactions between them and the volunteer could potentially bring up past trauma. 

As I continued to research I felt more and more guilty about taking these trips. 

I was asked to plan a lesson for thirty kids in a classroom, even though I barely had any experience working with kids and I couldn’t communicate with any of them. I helped spackle and paint the outside of a school. We did not do a very good job and somebody had to come in after us and fix it. I had gone to an orphanage and spent the whole day with a little girl. When I left her she was crying. I had built a connection with her and then left, leaving her vulnerable again. 

But not only was I coming into these communities with no skills whatsoever, I was also coming into these communities as someone who is white and middle class. 

Even while we were on these trips, I felt a little uncomfortable about this fact. When we would step off the bus, a whole group of white volunteers in matching shirts, the local people would be so excited. Cheering and jumping up and down. 

But that seems like It’s a little weird. I felt like I was facilitating the idea of a white savior. I didn’t want it to seem that way, but that was the way people were acting. 

As I go on my trip to Peru next month I want to focus on interacting with people in a positive way. I won’t participate if I don’t feel qualified or comfortable. I want to focus on the people more and not on myself. I don’t want to come back and talk about how I felt. I want to come back and think about all the people that I had met. I don’t want it to feel like I was a white savior coming in to help people. I want to help people in a way that I feel qualified. I want to ask them what they need, instead of just doing what I think they need. 

Since I’ve started going on humanitarian trips I have felt so many mixed emotions.

I felt so proud and happy about how I had gone on these trips with such good intentions. I felt so despairing about all the struggles that I had witnessed. 

I felt guilty and conflicted about participating. 

I don’t think there is any straightforward answer about whether or not people should be volunteering overseas. If teenagers should be coming into these communities with no skills or experience. I personally believe that even if you have good intentions that doesn’t exactly mean that you will be able to “do good.” You have to go into these experiences with legitimate intentions. You can’t just follow along with whatever is happening. Be aware of the impact you can make whether it be good or bad.