Timpview Reforges the Fellowship

Rachel Gledhill

Have you ever wondered why Mr. Stevenson disappears for several weeks each year? Most people believe that he is on military assignment and that’s what the government wants you to think. The truth his name isn’t really Jeremy Stevenson and he’s fighting a foe far more dangerous than any earthly army.

In the depths of Timpview, the truth was discovered when a distraught Mcilmoil was found huddled in agony near the cave of science. All he would say was “We wants it, we needs it. Must have the precious. They stole it from us. Sneaky little hobbitses. Wicked, tricksy, false!”.

When asked what had happened, the Main office claimed he was upset over funding awarded to the social studies department. It wasn’t hard to figure out what was going on after that. Timpview has been keeping a secret from us all, Sauron has returned…

Mr. Stevenson’s real name is Frodo Baggins and the fellowship has been reestablished. With this knowledge, the true identity of many of our teachers has come to light.

“I gave you the chance of aiding me willingly, but you have elected the way of pain.”

“Yes, perhaps, yes’ said Gollum. ‘Sméagol always helps, if they asks – if they asks nicely.’”

“What have I got in my pocket?” he said aloud.

“It must often be so, Sam, when things are in danger: someone has to give them up, lose them, so that others may keep them.”

“The sound of her footsteps was like a stream falling gently downhill over cool stones in the quiet of night.”

“One does not simply walk into Mordor…”